I think most couples who have been engaged can agree that there can be a lot of nerves and anxiety leading up to the wedding day (and even on the wedding day sometimes). I was worried that I would feel nervous and anxious on my wedding day and it was something I really hoped I didn't feel on that special day. I really just wanted to enjoy that day without reservation and I prayed that I would feel peace and know that I was making the right decision for my life.
When I woke up the morning on March 24, 2012 it actually amazed me how peaceful and happy I felt. I felt as though my Heavenly Father understood how much I needed a reassurance that I was making the right decision and happily gave me a special feeling of peace and joy that day. I felt so calm and reassured that I no longer worried about wanting to back out of anything at the last second. I got to just enjoy the morning with my mom and sisters when they came over to help me get ready. Though it was a simple gesture I thought it was adorable that Brandon texted me to say how happy he was that we were getting married. I don't know why but that thoughtfulness made me feel even more excited. I knew I was getting one amazing guy!
Once I was ready I dressed up in "Sunday best" for the temple. For those who don't know much about weddings in LDS temples the bride and groom enter wearing what we would typically wear on a Sunday (dress or skirt and blouse for a girl and suit and tie for a guy) and then once we are inside we go to our separate dressing rooms and the bride puts on her wedding gown and the groom wears white pants and a white shirt and white tie. My mom was there to help me get ready and to zip and fasten my dress which made the moment really special. I know this may sound silly but I have never felt so much like a princess as I did in that moment in the Bride's dressing room with my mom.
After Brandon and I each exited the dressing rooms we got to wait in the Celestial room together while the guests arrive. I remembered the feeling of peace and joy that I had felt that morning return, only the feelings were even stronger.
Soon Brandon and I knelt across from each other for the ceremony and I could feel the magnitude of that moment. I also knew so strongly that I was marrying the right person in the right place and I felt the spirit (the Holy Ghost or Holy Spirit as some might call it) so strongly! Its a moment that really no words can adequately describe. It was amazing and I was overjoyed! After the ceremony Brandon and I returned to our separate dressing rooms and I double checked my makeup and hair with assistance from my mom. Everything seemed to be in place and I was ready to go out and greet everyone waiting outside. However, due to the fact that I had several nieces and nephews who would quickly get bored in the waiting room of the temple we had to wait for them to be picked up by their parents so that everyone could be there once we came out.
When we exited the temple all our friends and family who were standing outside cheered loudly and Brandon and I couldn't help but smile and cheer with them. We were so happy to finally be husband and wife!
The rest of the day was a rush from pictures, to the luncheon, and then group pictures before the reception. It seems more like a blur of memories now, but forever it will be the greatest day of my life!
Here is a video explaining why we wear religious garments under our clothing and other symbolic clothing in the temples.
Tuesday, March 31, 2015
Tuesday, September 23, 2014
The Question
I am getting eager to start posting about what is more currently happening in me and Brandon's life but I feel like I can't get to that without sharing how he "popped the question" and sharing a little bit about the wedding day as well. So, sorry for any that might be anxiously waiting for me to get current with this blog, but I felt there were just a couple more posts to write first. So, this is the story leading up to our engagement:
Thanksgiving was a whirlwind of meeting family members and spending time with them. It was a ton of fun but also a lot to take in. I loved meeting everyone and seeing how Brandon's family celebrated the holiday with their extended families. But also by the end of the day we were both anxious to have a little one on one time since that time was hard to come by in the normal hustle and bustle of everyday life. Brandon decided to take me to Peterman's Sports Park, which is basically just a small park down the river from the Idaho Falls LDS temple. It was actually decent weather that night with our coats on and we wandered all around the park, enjoying the different scenery that the park has to offer. At the very end of our walk through the park Brandon and I walked down a bridge where you can stop and look down river and have a clear view of the Idaho Falls temple shining brightly in the darkness. We stopped to take in the view and suddenly we began talking about OUR future and in that moment it seemed that both of us just knew that we wanted our future to be together. It was a wonderful moment I will never forget! The feeling was incredible! As we ended our conversation and walked back to the car Brandon asked me if I wanted to go ring shopping the next day. Of course I said yes! When we got in the car Brandon paused a second before starting the car. I looked at him and he said "Um, so I have to admit something... I almost proposed back there without a ring." "I would have been fine with that" I said. He seemed a little bummed that he hadn't and we drove away. I won't go into all the details of ring shopping but it was fun and scary at the same time. That night we sat down with his mom and the conversation went quickly to possible wedding dates. We decided on a couple weekends that might work but I had to check those dates with my immediate family to see what would work for those that would have to travel. That week, despite the fact that we were not yet engaged we talked to family members and decided that March 24th was going to be our day.
That week Brandon asked me if I wanted to have dinner with my sister Angie and her family since we hadn't been able to spend time with them during Thanksgiving. I said that would be really fun so we arranged a time to have dinner my sister Angie and brother-in-law Ben during the week. Brandon also mentioned that he thought it would be fun to take another walk at the park after dinner with Angie and Ben on Sunday and I admit I was a little suspicious that he might propose, knowing that he had almost done so earlier that week in that exact park. However, I was a little confused and slightly disappointed when Brandon talked to me about going ring shopping that Saturday.
When Sunday finally rolled around I was hoping and wondering if Brandon would propose but I wasn't sure if he would knowing we had just looked at more rings the day before. That night we ended up having to meet at my sister's house for dinner. When I opened the door to see Brandon standing on the doorstep with a dozen roses I was surprised and admittedly thought "Yay, maybe he will propose tonight!" but I decided not to think about because I didn't want to be disappointed if he didn't. After dinner I felt a glimmer of hope again that he would propose when I realized that the first week of December had greeted us with some very cold weather (and that night in particular was in the negatives) and yet Brandon still wanted to go for our walk. I thought to myself as we walked out the door "He better be proposing tonight, otherwise he is crazy for wanting to go on a walk in this weather."A few seconds later I was talking myself out of the idea that he was proposing because I didn't want to get my hopes up, so I decided to put the thought out of my mind and enjoy the walk despite the freezing cold weather.
As we got out of the car and started walking down the bridge a view caught my eye that I was fascinated with and I got distracted for a second. Then as I looked forward again I noticed something a few feet away. There was a stream of moonlight that lit up a B heart J and I could also make out "Always and Forever" below that. (That last phrase had a special meaning for us because each time we would say "I love you" to each other the other would respond with "always and forever.") But I could also tell there was some smaller writing on the top of the log that I couldn't see in the darkness. I bent down to read it and as I got close I could see the following written at the top: "December 4, 2011 Engaged." Suddenly it dawned on me that he really was proposing (as that was the date).
I jumped up and spun around with an excited "Really?" He was already on one knee. I'm pretty sure he chuckled at my reaction and then said "Jennifer Banner, will you marry me?" "YES, OF COURSE!" I practically shouted out of pure joy and excitement. He stood up and put the ring on my finger and kissed me. It was another amazing moment I hope to never forget!
I was so excited to see that ring on my finger that despite the fact that it was below freezing I wouldn't put my glove on. As we walked back to the car Brandon told me that his parents were waiting for us at the end of the bridge to take a picture. When we got to their car they told us that the camera wouldn't turn on because it was too cold and the battery wasn't able to function. At first I was a little disappointed, but it didn't take long for me to decide it was actually pretty funny that we had gone on that walk in below freezing temperatures so that Brandon could propose in our special spot. Of course it was totally worth it! I returned to my sister's house and we announced we were engaged and showed her the ring. Since Brandon and I both had to work in Idaho Falls the next day he was going to stay in his room at home and I had arranged to stay in one his parents spare rooms. So, on our way to their house we called several close family members and friends to tell them the news. When we got to Brandon's house we stayed up for a few hours with his parents, excitedly talking about wedding plans and laughing about the fact that it had been cold enough to freeze the camera battery. So far, no amount of joy I had experienced previously could match what I felt that day and I wondered in the back of my mind if the happiness and joy could ever be matched by another day. Of course I should have known that March 24th was going to surpass even that much joy!
Thanksgiving was a whirlwind of meeting family members and spending time with them. It was a ton of fun but also a lot to take in. I loved meeting everyone and seeing how Brandon's family celebrated the holiday with their extended families. But also by the end of the day we were both anxious to have a little one on one time since that time was hard to come by in the normal hustle and bustle of everyday life. Brandon decided to take me to Peterman's Sports Park, which is basically just a small park down the river from the Idaho Falls LDS temple. It was actually decent weather that night with our coats on and we wandered all around the park, enjoying the different scenery that the park has to offer. At the very end of our walk through the park Brandon and I walked down a bridge where you can stop and look down river and have a clear view of the Idaho Falls temple shining brightly in the darkness. We stopped to take in the view and suddenly we began talking about OUR future and in that moment it seemed that both of us just knew that we wanted our future to be together. It was a wonderful moment I will never forget! The feeling was incredible! As we ended our conversation and walked back to the car Brandon asked me if I wanted to go ring shopping the next day. Of course I said yes! When we got in the car Brandon paused a second before starting the car. I looked at him and he said "Um, so I have to admit something... I almost proposed back there without a ring." "I would have been fine with that" I said. He seemed a little bummed that he hadn't and we drove away. I won't go into all the details of ring shopping but it was fun and scary at the same time. That night we sat down with his mom and the conversation went quickly to possible wedding dates. We decided on a couple weekends that might work but I had to check those dates with my immediate family to see what would work for those that would have to travel. That week, despite the fact that we were not yet engaged we talked to family members and decided that March 24th was going to be our day.
That week Brandon asked me if I wanted to have dinner with my sister Angie and her family since we hadn't been able to spend time with them during Thanksgiving. I said that would be really fun so we arranged a time to have dinner my sister Angie and brother-in-law Ben during the week. Brandon also mentioned that he thought it would be fun to take another walk at the park after dinner with Angie and Ben on Sunday and I admit I was a little suspicious that he might propose, knowing that he had almost done so earlier that week in that exact park. However, I was a little confused and slightly disappointed when Brandon talked to me about going ring shopping that Saturday.
When Sunday finally rolled around I was hoping and wondering if Brandon would propose but I wasn't sure if he would knowing we had just looked at more rings the day before. That night we ended up having to meet at my sister's house for dinner. When I opened the door to see Brandon standing on the doorstep with a dozen roses I was surprised and admittedly thought "Yay, maybe he will propose tonight!" but I decided not to think about because I didn't want to be disappointed if he didn't. After dinner I felt a glimmer of hope again that he would propose when I realized that the first week of December had greeted us with some very cold weather (and that night in particular was in the negatives) and yet Brandon still wanted to go for our walk. I thought to myself as we walked out the door "He better be proposing tonight, otherwise he is crazy for wanting to go on a walk in this weather."A few seconds later I was talking myself out of the idea that he was proposing because I didn't want to get my hopes up, so I decided to put the thought out of my mind and enjoy the walk despite the freezing cold weather.
As we got out of the car and started walking down the bridge a view caught my eye that I was fascinated with and I got distracted for a second. Then as I looked forward again I noticed something a few feet away. There was a stream of moonlight that lit up a B heart J and I could also make out "Always and Forever" below that. (That last phrase had a special meaning for us because each time we would say "I love you" to each other the other would respond with "always and forever.") But I could also tell there was some smaller writing on the top of the log that I couldn't see in the darkness. I bent down to read it and as I got close I could see the following written at the top: "December 4, 2011 Engaged." Suddenly it dawned on me that he really was proposing (as that was the date).
I jumped up and spun around with an excited "Really?" He was already on one knee. I'm pretty sure he chuckled at my reaction and then said "Jennifer Banner, will you marry me?" "YES, OF COURSE!" I practically shouted out of pure joy and excitement. He stood up and put the ring on my finger and kissed me. It was another amazing moment I hope to never forget!
I was so excited to see that ring on my finger that despite the fact that it was below freezing I wouldn't put my glove on. As we walked back to the car Brandon told me that his parents were waiting for us at the end of the bridge to take a picture. When we got to their car they told us that the camera wouldn't turn on because it was too cold and the battery wasn't able to function. At first I was a little disappointed, but it didn't take long for me to decide it was actually pretty funny that we had gone on that walk in below freezing temperatures so that Brandon could propose in our special spot. Of course it was totally worth it! I returned to my sister's house and we announced we were engaged and showed her the ring. Since Brandon and I both had to work in Idaho Falls the next day he was going to stay in his room at home and I had arranged to stay in one his parents spare rooms. So, on our way to their house we called several close family members and friends to tell them the news. When we got to Brandon's house we stayed up for a few hours with his parents, excitedly talking about wedding plans and laughing about the fact that it had been cold enough to freeze the camera battery. So far, no amount of joy I had experienced previously could match what I felt that day and I wondered in the back of my mind if the happiness and joy could ever be matched by another day. Of course I should have known that March 24th was going to surpass even that much joy!
Thursday, July 31, 2014
And the Rest is History
I can't tell you how many times I've heard the phrase "and the rest is history" to sum up a story. Its been over two years now since Brandon and I were in the dating stage so its definitely time to move on and catch up to where we are now. But, there are just a few things I want to share about our dating life so I guess now is the time to do that.
When I think back to how Brandon and I ended up dating and how easily we clicked and how things just "fell into place" it seems a lot like a fairytale right? After the first date everything pretty much just worked itself out. And yes, it was miraculous! But I don't want the way things worked out so perfectly for us to date to be confused with the reality of the relationship.
Relationships are never easy 100% of the time and yet that's sometimes what we think it should be like if it is "meant to be." I know I had a lot of misconceptions growing up about how life would be once I met the right person. So, I want to set the record straight for anyone wondering. No, me and Brandon's dating life wasn't 100% perfect. It had its ups and downs. But what made our relationship amazing to me was how we learned to work together and openly communicate about our differences.
Just like anyone else we had our misunderstandings, each of us sometimes came into a situation with unrealistic expectations and were disappointed, we got frustrated with each other once in a while. Basically we faced a lot of what every other couple faces and we learned a lot!
The other difficult part of our relationship was honestly for both of us to come to our own conclusions that we had both found the person we wanted to spend the rest of eternity with. How did we know we were ready to commit to forever?
Well for me I was luckily somewhat prepared by life experiences to know what I really needed and a little of what I wanted. But let me just say that just months before we started dating my idea of my perfect guy was a mile long. I'm just glad I had a friend who was able to point out to me that I needed to be more realistic about my expectations and desires.
My dear friend Savannah gave me a book that talked a lot about how so many girls have long lists of what they want their future husband to be like. The author gives examples of herself and many other friends who each made the mistake of passing up a perfectly good guy because they didn't have a few things on "the list" that they had wanted. This was a hard pill for me to swallow at first, but I came to realize that there were definitely things on my list that I thought were "deal breakers" that really weren't. One big one on that list was that I wanted to marry a dancer. I thought that I couldn't be happy unless I married someone who loved to dance as much as I did. After reading that book though, I realized that was a want, but not really a need (as were several things on the list). I realized that what I really needed was a guy who was a disciple of Jesus Christ and a valiant member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, as well as someone who could balance my personality with their own, treat me as an equal, be understanding about my sensitive nature but who could also lighten me up a little and make me laugh and help me enjoy life.
I'm so glad I learned that before Brandon came along. Otherwise I might have missed out on the best guy I have ever known, who is absolutely perfect for me (even with the fact that he doesn't really love to dance)!
For Brandon I think the hard part was that he didn't have the luxury that I did of having dated around a ton. He had dated some, but not nearly as much as I had. Sometimes I wondered if he was positive he wanted to marry me because he hadn't had the same opportunity to really date around as much. But in the end it really didn't matter to him. He decided he wanted to marry me because our strengths and weaknesses complimented each other and so did our personalities, and he felt that I was what he really needed and some of what he really wanted too. Along the way he decided that he didn't want to give all that away just because he was curious about what other girls had to offer.
We both knew from the start that what we had was unique and special, that we had both experienced an amazing and almost instant connection, and that we both had the same goals and dreams. We also both realized that most importantly we couldn't imagine not having each other! What other proof did we need that we were ready to commit to make that big step? We decided we didn't need more proof than that and we still both agree to this day (more than 2 years later) that marrying each other was the best decision we have ever made!!!
So, the perhaps I could have ended my last post with "and the rest was history" but I really wanted people to understand that though making that decision isn't always easy because it is such a HUGE decision, make it wisely with the understanding that though the one you love is not perfect, they may be perfect for you!
Here are some of our dating pictures!
Pictured below from top to bottom and left to right: Attending General Conference in Utah, getting ready for a bon fire at the Carney's, watching a BSU game with my family in Boise, Halloween night, hanging out at the Carney family Thanksgiving
When I think back to how Brandon and I ended up dating and how easily we clicked and how things just "fell into place" it seems a lot like a fairytale right? After the first date everything pretty much just worked itself out. And yes, it was miraculous! But I don't want the way things worked out so perfectly for us to date to be confused with the reality of the relationship.
Relationships are never easy 100% of the time and yet that's sometimes what we think it should be like if it is "meant to be." I know I had a lot of misconceptions growing up about how life would be once I met the right person. So, I want to set the record straight for anyone wondering. No, me and Brandon's dating life wasn't 100% perfect. It had its ups and downs. But what made our relationship amazing to me was how we learned to work together and openly communicate about our differences.
Just like anyone else we had our misunderstandings, each of us sometimes came into a situation with unrealistic expectations and were disappointed, we got frustrated with each other once in a while. Basically we faced a lot of what every other couple faces and we learned a lot!
The other difficult part of our relationship was honestly for both of us to come to our own conclusions that we had both found the person we wanted to spend the rest of eternity with. How did we know we were ready to commit to forever?
Well for me I was luckily somewhat prepared by life experiences to know what I really needed and a little of what I wanted. But let me just say that just months before we started dating my idea of my perfect guy was a mile long. I'm just glad I had a friend who was able to point out to me that I needed to be more realistic about my expectations and desires.
My dear friend Savannah gave me a book that talked a lot about how so many girls have long lists of what they want their future husband to be like. The author gives examples of herself and many other friends who each made the mistake of passing up a perfectly good guy because they didn't have a few things on "the list" that they had wanted. This was a hard pill for me to swallow at first, but I came to realize that there were definitely things on my list that I thought were "deal breakers" that really weren't. One big one on that list was that I wanted to marry a dancer. I thought that I couldn't be happy unless I married someone who loved to dance as much as I did. After reading that book though, I realized that was a want, but not really a need (as were several things on the list). I realized that what I really needed was a guy who was a disciple of Jesus Christ and a valiant member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, as well as someone who could balance my personality with their own, treat me as an equal, be understanding about my sensitive nature but who could also lighten me up a little and make me laugh and help me enjoy life.
I'm so glad I learned that before Brandon came along. Otherwise I might have missed out on the best guy I have ever known, who is absolutely perfect for me (even with the fact that he doesn't really love to dance)!
For Brandon I think the hard part was that he didn't have the luxury that I did of having dated around a ton. He had dated some, but not nearly as much as I had. Sometimes I wondered if he was positive he wanted to marry me because he hadn't had the same opportunity to really date around as much. But in the end it really didn't matter to him. He decided he wanted to marry me because our strengths and weaknesses complimented each other and so did our personalities, and he felt that I was what he really needed and some of what he really wanted too. Along the way he decided that he didn't want to give all that away just because he was curious about what other girls had to offer.
We both knew from the start that what we had was unique and special, that we had both experienced an amazing and almost instant connection, and that we both had the same goals and dreams. We also both realized that most importantly we couldn't imagine not having each other! What other proof did we need that we were ready to commit to make that big step? We decided we didn't need more proof than that and we still both agree to this day (more than 2 years later) that marrying each other was the best decision we have ever made!!!
So, the perhaps I could have ended my last post with "and the rest was history" but I really wanted people to understand that though making that decision isn't always easy because it is such a HUGE decision, make it wisely with the understanding that though the one you love is not perfect, they may be perfect for you!
Here are some of our dating pictures!
Pictured below from top to bottom and left to right: Attending General Conference in Utah, getting ready for a bon fire at the Carney's, watching a BSU game with my family in Boise, Halloween night, hanging out at the Carney family Thanksgiving
The Interview
I was a bit nervous about my interview because I honestly didn't really know a lot about PSR. All I knew was that I was going to be working with children and adults dealing with behavioral or mental issues, and that I had to be somewhat qualified for the job because I had a friend who I graduated with in the Child Development program who had immediately taken a PSR job after graduation.
The morning of the interview I was all ready to go except for double checking the address for the PSR office. I felt pretty good as I walked out the door knowing that I was going to be at least 15 minutes early. As I approached the building it didn't really seem to be what I had expected; it wasn't the office-like atmosphere I had anticipated. However, there was a lady working at the front desk and so I asked her where I might be able to find the PSR director. She directed me to a door leading to a basement. As I stood at the base of the stairs I was confused by the fact that the room was full of what appeared to be several PSR workers and their clients. My surprise and confusion at the scene froze me to my spot near the stairs until suddenly one of the adults in the room turned to me and asked who I was looking for. When I stated that I was looking for the PSR director she said "Oh, you're here for an interview?" So of course I told her I was. She had a look of sympathy on her face and said "Well, you're actually at the wrong place. We come here to work with our clients but this isn't the office." I immediately felt my face getting hot and I was sure it was turning brighter red with every second. "Let me call the director" she said. Thankfully she reached him right away and explained to him that I was there for the interview but said she would direct me to the office. I was grateful that she took the time to call him because at least he knew I wasn't late to my interview for no reason. Still, I was pretty embarrassed.
When I got to the actual office building I was definitely more nervous than I anticipated. As I sat down with the PSR Director and one of the owners of the counseling agency I soon felt a calm come over me. I don't really remember a lot of details of the interview, but I remember that when I left I felt a sense of peace and satisfaction with how it had gone.
As I left the office building I called Brandon to let him know my interview was over and that I was going to come back to Rexburg and attend devotional with him. He promised he would save me a seat. When I found him at the BYU-I Center he gave me a hug and asked me how it had gone. I told him I felt good about it and he reassured me that I was likely to get the job. After devotional we went back to Brandon's apartment and I got to meet his roommates as well as talk to his brother Jared who had just returned from Iraq. Jared having known me from our previous student ward was a little surprised by the news that Brandon and I were dating, but he was supportive and happy for us (which was a definite plus). Around 5pm I reluctantly said my good-byes to Brandon and his friends. He walked me to the car and I could already feel a twinge of sadness at having to say goodbye once again. I couldn't help but hope and pray that this was one of our last goodbyes we had to face.
The following day in the cornfield my boss randomly started to ask me what my plans where as far as finding a job in a field relating to my degree. I decided it was the perfect time to let him know I had actually had an interview the previous day in Idaho Falls and was supposed to hear back by Friday. He was happy to hear that and said he was anxious to hear any updates. I was grateful that he was more happy for me than anything else.
After getting off work by noon again that day I headed in to the office where my mom works to do some filing (which I often did as a part time job to help her out as well as earn some extra money). While I was filing some papers I got a call from the counseling agency offering me the job. I accepted and asked when they would like me to start. They mentioned that they would like me to start the next day. I was a little shocked by that and had to explain that I would need time to move but would be willing to start on Monday. They agreed that would work and we set up a time for my training.
After the conversation I rushed into my mom's office to tell her the news. She was surprised but also happy for me. After I finished filing papers for my mom I rushed home to start packing, feeling excited to tell Brandon. But suddenly it hit me that I also needed to call my boss from the cornfield and fill him in on the situation. When I called my boss I nervously explained that I had been offered the job and reminded him that I had taken the day off Friday to watch my niece Abby. "So I guess today was your last day then" he said in a light tone. "Yeah, I guess so" I replied. I thanked him for being a great boss and for being understanding of the situation. He told me he was happy for me and excited for my new adventure but told me that if I ever needed to come back to the cornfield I would always be welcome.
I was grateful for his reaction to the situation and relieved that I hadn't lost his respect somehow. As I packed up my room and let my friends from work and my singles ward know I was leaving I felt both sadness and anticipation for the journey ahead of me. And though I was sad to leave my friends I was grateful for their support as I jumped feet first into a great adventure, not really knowing how it would all turn out.
When I got to the actual office building I was definitely more nervous than I anticipated. As I sat down with the PSR Director and one of the owners of the counseling agency I soon felt a calm come over me. I don't really remember a lot of details of the interview, but I remember that when I left I felt a sense of peace and satisfaction with how it had gone.
As I left the office building I called Brandon to let him know my interview was over and that I was going to come back to Rexburg and attend devotional with him. He promised he would save me a seat. When I found him at the BYU-I Center he gave me a hug and asked me how it had gone. I told him I felt good about it and he reassured me that I was likely to get the job. After devotional we went back to Brandon's apartment and I got to meet his roommates as well as talk to his brother Jared who had just returned from Iraq. Jared having known me from our previous student ward was a little surprised by the news that Brandon and I were dating, but he was supportive and happy for us (which was a definite plus). Around 5pm I reluctantly said my good-byes to Brandon and his friends. He walked me to the car and I could already feel a twinge of sadness at having to say goodbye once again. I couldn't help but hope and pray that this was one of our last goodbyes we had to face.
The following day in the cornfield my boss randomly started to ask me what my plans where as far as finding a job in a field relating to my degree. I decided it was the perfect time to let him know I had actually had an interview the previous day in Idaho Falls and was supposed to hear back by Friday. He was happy to hear that and said he was anxious to hear any updates. I was grateful that he was more happy for me than anything else.
After getting off work by noon again that day I headed in to the office where my mom works to do some filing (which I often did as a part time job to help her out as well as earn some extra money). While I was filing some papers I got a call from the counseling agency offering me the job. I accepted and asked when they would like me to start. They mentioned that they would like me to start the next day. I was a little shocked by that and had to explain that I would need time to move but would be willing to start on Monday. They agreed that would work and we set up a time for my training.
After the conversation I rushed into my mom's office to tell her the news. She was surprised but also happy for me. After I finished filing papers for my mom I rushed home to start packing, feeling excited to tell Brandon. But suddenly it hit me that I also needed to call my boss from the cornfield and fill him in on the situation. When I called my boss I nervously explained that I had been offered the job and reminded him that I had taken the day off Friday to watch my niece Abby. "So I guess today was your last day then" he said in a light tone. "Yeah, I guess so" I replied. I thanked him for being a great boss and for being understanding of the situation. He told me he was happy for me and excited for my new adventure but told me that if I ever needed to come back to the cornfield I would always be welcome.
I was grateful for his reaction to the situation and relieved that I hadn't lost his respect somehow. As I packed up my room and let my friends from work and my singles ward know I was leaving I felt both sadness and anticipation for the journey ahead of me. And though I was sad to leave my friends I was grateful for their support as I jumped feet first into a great adventure, not really knowing how it would all turn out.
Friday, July 18, 2014
The Phone Call
Even before Brandon and I were official he had mentioned that I should move back to Rexburg and since all the jobs I had been hoping for in Utah hadn't panned out I decided that I would just try my luck with applying for jobs in the Rexburg and Idaho Falls area. As I headed home the next morning (Sunday) with my mom in the car I was even more determined to find a job there. In fact, some of the time that Brandon and I had spent in the park the previous day was spent talking about what jobs I could possibly do in Rexburg or Idaho Falls. He had even offered to take my resume to a few places for me. Now that we were really "official" though I felt even more determined to move closer to him because I knew long distance would be pretty hard for us.
When my mom and I arrived home we made it just in time for her to go to the family ward and for me to go to my singles ward. The only thing I remember about church that day was getting to announce in Relief Society that I had a boyfriend! (Normally I get a lot more out of it, I promise! But I was a bit "twitter pated"!)
After church was also kind of a blur besides the fact that my parents both took turns teasing me about marrying Brandon and wedding plans. I knew they were just teasing me but at the same time I knew they had never ever teased me about marrying anyone else so I was pretty sure they either really liked Brandon or saw that I REALLY liked Brandon... or maybe both. Either way it made me both excited and extremely scared all at the same time.
On Monday (the next day) I had to go back to work in the cornfield again. Out there I hardly ever kept my phone in my pack because if it ever fell out you would never find it; so naturally my cell phone was left in my lunch box and only looked at on breaks. When I returned for the morning break I realized that I had a missed call and a voicemail. As I listened to the voicemail I was completely shocked and excited. One of the counseling agencies I had applied at for a PSR (Psychosocial Rehabilitation) Specialist position a couple weeks before had called to say they wanted to interview me! I knew I didn't have time to call them back during breaks but I was really glad to know we were going to have a short work day so I could call as soon as I got off work.
When I finally got to talk to the PSR Director a few hours later he asked if I would be available to interview the next day (Tuesday). Luckily it was a slow week for the cornfield so we were only working Monday, Wednesday and Friday, so of course I said yes.
I decided it would be better to just leave that day so that I had plenty of time to get to the interview. I packed quickly and was on the road by 2pm. I called Brandon on my way down there and he actually didn't get back to me for a couple hours so I was about half way to Rexburg when I called him. He was pretty excited about the interview and that I was going to be able to see him that evening as well. We planned to meet up as soon as he finished rock climbing with his brother Jared. After the long drive to Rexburg I was a little tired, but as soon as Brandon wrapped his arms around me in a warm embrace I forgot I was tired because all I knew was that suddenly I felt at home.
When my mom and I arrived home we made it just in time for her to go to the family ward and for me to go to my singles ward. The only thing I remember about church that day was getting to announce in Relief Society that I had a boyfriend! (Normally I get a lot more out of it, I promise! But I was a bit "twitter pated"!)
After church was also kind of a blur besides the fact that my parents both took turns teasing me about marrying Brandon and wedding plans. I knew they were just teasing me but at the same time I knew they had never ever teased me about marrying anyone else so I was pretty sure they either really liked Brandon or saw that I REALLY liked Brandon... or maybe both. Either way it made me both excited and extremely scared all at the same time.
On Monday (the next day) I had to go back to work in the cornfield again. Out there I hardly ever kept my phone in my pack because if it ever fell out you would never find it; so naturally my cell phone was left in my lunch box and only looked at on breaks. When I returned for the morning break I realized that I had a missed call and a voicemail. As I listened to the voicemail I was completely shocked and excited. One of the counseling agencies I had applied at for a PSR (Psychosocial Rehabilitation) Specialist position a couple weeks before had called to say they wanted to interview me! I knew I didn't have time to call them back during breaks but I was really glad to know we were going to have a short work day so I could call as soon as I got off work.
When I finally got to talk to the PSR Director a few hours later he asked if I would be available to interview the next day (Tuesday). Luckily it was a slow week for the cornfield so we were only working Monday, Wednesday and Friday, so of course I said yes.
I decided it would be better to just leave that day so that I had plenty of time to get to the interview. I packed quickly and was on the road by 2pm. I called Brandon on my way down there and he actually didn't get back to me for a couple hours so I was about half way to Rexburg when I called him. He was pretty excited about the interview and that I was going to be able to see him that evening as well. We planned to meet up as soon as he finished rock climbing with his brother Jared. After the long drive to Rexburg I was a little tired, but as soon as Brandon wrapped his arms around me in a warm embrace I forgot I was tired because all I knew was that suddenly I felt at home.
To Be, or Not to Be (Official), That is the Question
The following day Brandon called me and asked if I wanted to go to DI (for those not familiar with that acronym it stands for Deseret Industries and is a store similar to Goodwill) with him and a couple friends and of course I said yes. He had invited Keith to come as well so I met up with Keith and then we met up with Brandon. As we drove to DI Brandon kept tickling me by poking me in the side. I was pretty happy that he was being so flirtatious in front of his friends and I took that as a pretty good sign. Soon we were walking around the various aisles looking at random things and our hands brushed and to my surprise Brandon grabbed my hand. We continued walking around the store hand in hand but I had to wonder if he would let go once we reached my brother and the group of friends who were busy looking at the clothing racks. But to my surprise and joy, he didn't let go as we approached them a few minutes later.
Of course I was happy that we were holding hands but I also had some questions running through my mind. Admittedly I am one of those people who over analyzes everything so I kept wondering things like "What does hand holding mean to Brandon? Does that mean we're official? What are we going to tell our friends if they ask?" I tried to bring up some of those questions but I could tell Brandon wasn't quite ready to answer them yet but I also warned him that all of our friends were going to have questions as well.
Sure enough, as we met up with a bunch of different groups of friends throughout the day and even bumped into some of my previous volunteer group leaders we got a lot of awkward questions like "So, is this your boyfriend/girlfriend?" or "How long has this been going on?" I kept waiting for Brandon to give them an explanation because I was curious myself and really wanted answers too. But to my disappointment Brandon changed the subject or gave short, nondescript answers each time someone asked. Even though I really wanted to know if holding my hand all day in front of everyone meant anything I decided to just have fun and enjoy the day and try not to worry about it. And we did have lots of fun! We spent time just at the park just talking and getting to know each other, rode a tandem bike together, wandered around campus and went to I-Night. Every moment that passed gave me more confidence in my feelings for Brandon. Once again I found myself feeling surprised at how easy, comfortable and natural everything felt between us. I had never felt that same feeling with anyone else and knowing that made me nervous and excited all at the same time. That day came to a close way too quickly and before I knew it Brandon was walking me back to my parents van where we would have to say goodbye (as I had to leave to go back home very early the next morning). When we reached the van Brandon told me he wanted to talk to me a little before I left. It was getting cold and so we both got inside the van and I started it up to keep us warm as we talked. The details of the majority of that conversation have been forgotten but I do know that I finally asked Brandon if he knew he wanted to be official or not. He said that he was okay with being official but he also seemed a little nervous about it and I could tell that it was kind of scary for him to make that decision. I asked him if he was sure but assured me that he was. We got out of the van and hugged and said our goodbyes. As I watched him wave in the rear view mirror I knew I missed him already.
Of course I was happy that we were holding hands but I also had some questions running through my mind. Admittedly I am one of those people who over analyzes everything so I kept wondering things like "What does hand holding mean to Brandon? Does that mean we're official? What are we going to tell our friends if they ask?" I tried to bring up some of those questions but I could tell Brandon wasn't quite ready to answer them yet but I also warned him that all of our friends were going to have questions as well.
Sure enough, as we met up with a bunch of different groups of friends throughout the day and even bumped into some of my previous volunteer group leaders we got a lot of awkward questions like "So, is this your boyfriend/girlfriend?" or "How long has this been going on?" I kept waiting for Brandon to give them an explanation because I was curious myself and really wanted answers too. But to my disappointment Brandon changed the subject or gave short, nondescript answers each time someone asked. Even though I really wanted to know if holding my hand all day in front of everyone meant anything I decided to just have fun and enjoy the day and try not to worry about it. And we did have lots of fun! We spent time just at the park just talking and getting to know each other, rode a tandem bike together, wandered around campus and went to I-Night. Every moment that passed gave me more confidence in my feelings for Brandon. Once again I found myself feeling surprised at how easy, comfortable and natural everything felt between us. I had never felt that same feeling with anyone else and knowing that made me nervous and excited all at the same time. That day came to a close way too quickly and before I knew it Brandon was walking me back to my parents van where we would have to say goodbye (as I had to leave to go back home very early the next morning). When we reached the van Brandon told me he wanted to talk to me a little before I left. It was getting cold and so we both got inside the van and I started it up to keep us warm as we talked. The details of the majority of that conversation have been forgotten but I do know that I finally asked Brandon if he knew he wanted to be official or not. He said that he was okay with being official but he also seemed a little nervous about it and I could tell that it was kind of scary for him to make that decision. I asked him if he was sure but assured me that he was. We got out of the van and hugged and said our goodbyes. As I watched him wave in the rear view mirror I knew I missed him already.
Saturday, October 12, 2013
Rexburg Revisited
The drive to Rexburg had never seemed longer, as I was anxiously waiting to see Brandon again. It felt as if the day had dragged on immeasurably, and that I was going to be stuck forever in the mid-afternoon of that Friday. When we reached Idaho Falls I felt even more anxious knowing that I was only a half-hour away from seeing Brandon again. But the words from Brandon's most recent phone call drifted back into my mind "If things go well this weekend I think I would like to date you." Was I really going to be in a relationship with the most amazing boy I had ever met within a matter of a few hours? I couldn't decide if those words were comforting, or just causing additional anxiety; for I felt a sense of pressure to live up to whoever he had decided he liked that Saturday almost two weeks previous.
The string of thoughts was broken as my mom announced that she and Keith would be going food shopping at WinCo instead of trying to brave the crowds at any of the Rexburg grocery stores. I knew it was a good idea that made sense for my mom and for Keith, but I groaned inwardly, knowing that this would surely add at least an hour to the expected arrival time. As the minutes passed I felt myself growing more and more anxious. After two long hours I could hardly take the waiting much longer. I gave in and called my mom, asking how much longer they might be. She said that they had just reached the checkout line and that they should be home soon. Almost thirty minutes later my mom and Keith walked in the door. I jumped up off of Angie's couch (my sister Angie this time) and asked if it was time to go to Rexburg. My mom acknowledged that we could now make our way to Rexburg. I texted Brandon to let him know that we were just now leaving Idaho Falls. It was just past 7:30pm and he mentioned that the New Student Talent show was starting at 8:00pm so we would have to meet up afterwards. I was nearly heartbroken.
"How long is the show going to last?" I asked him.
"Probably an hour. Hour and a half maybe."
"What?!" I thought. "This can't be. I can't stand waiting another 2 hours to see Brandon!"
"Okay" I replied to him, "see you after the show."
When I got off the phone I told my mom that the show was starting and that I would now have to wait even longer to see Brandon. I did't want to get upset, but I could feel my frustration rising to the surface of my emotions. I finally admitted to my mom that I was not too happy to have had to wait so long to see Brandon, and had not expected the extra delays. She was sympathetic to my frustrations and said that she would drop me off by the Hart Building so I could attend the talent show with Brandon. I was grateful of her understanding and agreed that would be a pleasant alternative. I called Brandon once again and he liked the idea as well and sent me a text of the seats he was sitting in. When my mom dropped my off near the curb of the Hart Building I felt a little off balance and self-conscious. It had been almost two weeks since I had seen him and we had mostly texted and only when neither of us were working, so I felt a little anxious, not knowing what to expect or if he would feel differently about me after spending more time with me. When I finally pulled open the door to the Hart Building my own heart was pounding once again. I felt that perhaps anyone walking by would even be able to hear it with how loud it seemed to my own ears. When I finally reached Brandon I thought my heart would pound right through my ribcage. As I approached him he embraced me, and I felt myself relax and a certain calm spread over me. I soon felt I was myself again and could enjoy the talent show, as well as enjoying the fact that I was once again seated by Brandon Carney. The talent show was actually quite impressive and Brandon and I talked a bit about some of our favorite numbers as we exited the gym. I then got a text that my mom was going to return to Idaho Falls soon with Angie and Ben, to stay the night at their house. I told Brandon I wanted to say goodbye and asked if he wanted to come. He said that he did. As we approached my sister and brother-in-laws car I heard Brandon call out "Hi mom!" as he greeted my mom with a hug. I was surprised and admittedly hopeful for our future when he called my own mother his mom. I felt that maybe he knew what was to come, and perhaps, eventually he could really call my mom his mom as well.
The string of thoughts was broken as my mom announced that she and Keith would be going food shopping at WinCo instead of trying to brave the crowds at any of the Rexburg grocery stores. I knew it was a good idea that made sense for my mom and for Keith, but I groaned inwardly, knowing that this would surely add at least an hour to the expected arrival time. As the minutes passed I felt myself growing more and more anxious. After two long hours I could hardly take the waiting much longer. I gave in and called my mom, asking how much longer they might be. She said that they had just reached the checkout line and that they should be home soon. Almost thirty minutes later my mom and Keith walked in the door. I jumped up off of Angie's couch (my sister Angie this time) and asked if it was time to go to Rexburg. My mom acknowledged that we could now make our way to Rexburg. I texted Brandon to let him know that we were just now leaving Idaho Falls. It was just past 7:30pm and he mentioned that the New Student Talent show was starting at 8:00pm so we would have to meet up afterwards. I was nearly heartbroken.
"How long is the show going to last?" I asked him.
"Probably an hour. Hour and a half maybe."
"What?!" I thought. "This can't be. I can't stand waiting another 2 hours to see Brandon!"
"Okay" I replied to him, "see you after the show."
When I got off the phone I told my mom that the show was starting and that I would now have to wait even longer to see Brandon. I did't want to get upset, but I could feel my frustration rising to the surface of my emotions. I finally admitted to my mom that I was not too happy to have had to wait so long to see Brandon, and had not expected the extra delays. She was sympathetic to my frustrations and said that she would drop me off by the Hart Building so I could attend the talent show with Brandon. I was grateful of her understanding and agreed that would be a pleasant alternative. I called Brandon once again and he liked the idea as well and sent me a text of the seats he was sitting in. When my mom dropped my off near the curb of the Hart Building I felt a little off balance and self-conscious. It had been almost two weeks since I had seen him and we had mostly texted and only when neither of us were working, so I felt a little anxious, not knowing what to expect or if he would feel differently about me after spending more time with me. When I finally pulled open the door to the Hart Building my own heart was pounding once again. I felt that perhaps anyone walking by would even be able to hear it with how loud it seemed to my own ears. When I finally reached Brandon I thought my heart would pound right through my ribcage. As I approached him he embraced me, and I felt myself relax and a certain calm spread over me. I soon felt I was myself again and could enjoy the talent show, as well as enjoying the fact that I was once again seated by Brandon Carney. The talent show was actually quite impressive and Brandon and I talked a bit about some of our favorite numbers as we exited the gym. I then got a text that my mom was going to return to Idaho Falls soon with Angie and Ben, to stay the night at their house. I told Brandon I wanted to say goodbye and asked if he wanted to come. He said that he did. As we approached my sister and brother-in-laws car I heard Brandon call out "Hi mom!" as he greeted my mom with a hug. I was surprised and admittedly hopeful for our future when he called my own mother his mom. I felt that maybe he knew what was to come, and perhaps, eventually he could really call my mom his mom as well.
Visiting Ryan Scott
My friend Ryan Scott, is the hardest person to describe in the whole world! Why? Because he is so unique, so different from anyone else I have ever known. He has a heart of gold, and yet some who do not know him well, might think otherwise. When I first met him I honestly wasn't too fond of him either, but after getting to know Ryan Scott over the course of a few semesters at BYU-Idaho I grew to respect and admire him. I learned that Ryan doesn't expect a lot in return for his friendship, all he cared about was having the friendship reciprocated. That, I suspect, is one of the reasons we became so close. He wasn't the type of guy who would only befriend those he thought he could marry (as many of his own age and circumstance did) but was a friend to anyone who would take the time to get to know him. Which is why Ryan and I were able to be close, we both enjoyed the simple pleasure of a mutual friendship.
A couple semesters previous to my own graduation he had graduated and moved away to Kentucky to work for a research company. After I had graduated I was of course at home and working in the cornfields. Occasionally we would call each other to keep in touch and sometimes talked about how fun it would be to get to see each other again. So, after a few conversations about it we decided I would come to Kentucky to visit him. He even bought my plane tickets to make up for the fact that I was traveling so far to see him.
Visiting Ryan was so much fun. I got to meet some of his family members, and see what his own "post graduate life" was like. It also felt great to get to catch up with such a dear friend. In describing to Ryan the previous events that had transpired between Brandon and myself, Ryan was supportive and happy. Though I had seen Ryan become like a protective older brother seeing me with other guys I had dated, he immediately expressed his approval of Brandon (having had the opportunity to room with Brandon during his last semester) and knowing well that Brandon was a good person.
I'm sure Ryan probably thought it was funny to see how giddy I was every time I got a text from Brandon--although one particular text that I got from him made me more nervous than anything else! When I saw a text from him that said something to the effect of "So, I heard you talked to Spencer the other day? Is there anything you wanted to tell me?" I blushed, and decided I didn't want to be the first to share my feelings. So instead I turned the question around and asked him the same thing. He confirmed that he had talked to Spencer and said we should talk sometime soon. I told him I was actually in Kentucky visiting Ryan Scott and that we were busy that evening, but he could call the following evening because we didn't have anything specific planned.
The next evening I felt on edge, with the hope and anticipation of the phone call soon to come. When my phone finally did ring I practically ran to the spare bedroom of Ryan's apartment to talk to Brandon. I don't think I have ever enjoyed a phone conversation so much as the one in which Brandon and I admitted our feelings for one another. He mentioned that he had wanted to tell me he liked me by the camp fire at Savannah's party, but that the teenage boys had ruined his opportunity. He admitted he also really wanted to hold my hand and that is why he offered to drive my car at the end of our date. I then admitted that I liked him and had hoped he would bring it up as we talked by the fire at Savannah's party, and even suspected that he might have wanted to hold my hand that night. I also told him that I felt very comfortable with him; more comfortable than I had ever been with any other guy I had ever met. During the end of our conversation I told him I was probably going to be visiting Rexburg the next weekend to help Keith and my mom unpack all of Keith's belongings into his apartment. Brandon really liked the idea of my coming to Rexburg and asked me to keep in touch until then. Finally Brandon admitted that his friend Shane had been at his house for the last 20 minutes and that he should probably get off the phone so he could visit with him. I smiled as we said goodbye, knowing that for once the feelings for each other were mutual.
When I got off the phone I ran to tell Ryan all the good news, and that Brandon had now told me himself how much he liked me. Ryan seemed pleased, and I could see it in his eyes, that he was happy for me.
A couple semesters previous to my own graduation he had graduated and moved away to Kentucky to work for a research company. After I had graduated I was of course at home and working in the cornfields. Occasionally we would call each other to keep in touch and sometimes talked about how fun it would be to get to see each other again. So, after a few conversations about it we decided I would come to Kentucky to visit him. He even bought my plane tickets to make up for the fact that I was traveling so far to see him.
Visiting Ryan was so much fun. I got to meet some of his family members, and see what his own "post graduate life" was like. It also felt great to get to catch up with such a dear friend. In describing to Ryan the previous events that had transpired between Brandon and myself, Ryan was supportive and happy. Though I had seen Ryan become like a protective older brother seeing me with other guys I had dated, he immediately expressed his approval of Brandon (having had the opportunity to room with Brandon during his last semester) and knowing well that Brandon was a good person.
I'm sure Ryan probably thought it was funny to see how giddy I was every time I got a text from Brandon--although one particular text that I got from him made me more nervous than anything else! When I saw a text from him that said something to the effect of "So, I heard you talked to Spencer the other day? Is there anything you wanted to tell me?" I blushed, and decided I didn't want to be the first to share my feelings. So instead I turned the question around and asked him the same thing. He confirmed that he had talked to Spencer and said we should talk sometime soon. I told him I was actually in Kentucky visiting Ryan Scott and that we were busy that evening, but he could call the following evening because we didn't have anything specific planned.
The next evening I felt on edge, with the hope and anticipation of the phone call soon to come. When my phone finally did ring I practically ran to the spare bedroom of Ryan's apartment to talk to Brandon. I don't think I have ever enjoyed a phone conversation so much as the one in which Brandon and I admitted our feelings for one another. He mentioned that he had wanted to tell me he liked me by the camp fire at Savannah's party, but that the teenage boys had ruined his opportunity. He admitted he also really wanted to hold my hand and that is why he offered to drive my car at the end of our date. I then admitted that I liked him and had hoped he would bring it up as we talked by the fire at Savannah's party, and even suspected that he might have wanted to hold my hand that night. I also told him that I felt very comfortable with him; more comfortable than I had ever been with any other guy I had ever met. During the end of our conversation I told him I was probably going to be visiting Rexburg the next weekend to help Keith and my mom unpack all of Keith's belongings into his apartment. Brandon really liked the idea of my coming to Rexburg and asked me to keep in touch until then. Finally Brandon admitted that his friend Shane had been at his house for the last 20 minutes and that he should probably get off the phone so he could visit with him. I smiled as we said goodbye, knowing that for once the feelings for each other were mutual.
When I got off the phone I ran to tell Ryan all the good news, and that Brandon had now told me himself how much he liked me. Ryan seemed pleased, and I could see it in his eyes, that he was happy for me.
Monday, September 10, 2012
Maybe Miracles Do Happen
After church on Sunday my parents and I were talking about the weekend and how things had gone with Brandon. I told them how comfortable it was to be with them and how much I liked Brandon already. I also explained that even though we hadn't been close friends previous to this trip I felt so close to him already. And I already missed him! Which was weird to me, knowing that I had actually gotten used to goodbyes from past college experiences.
My dad mentioned that he liked Brandon a lot (more than any other guy he had met). My mom seemed a little more cautious. She expressed her approval of Brandon but cautioned me to not get my hopes up. I think my mom was just worried about me getting hurt and I couldn't blame her. In the past I had let my heart surpass logic. I had fallen for guys who really didn't care about me, and I had been hurt before. But in the past year I had been trying to learn from previous mistakes because I was determined to never fall for another guy unless he had first said in plain words, that we was falling for me. And so I explained to my mom that I would be careful, and not make any assumtions from the previous day.
That same day when I was on facebook I happened to be talking to my friend (and old FHE brother) Spencer Brown. Spencer just happed to have been Brandon's roommate during the previous semester. He asked me what I had been up to and I mentioned that Brandon had come for a visit. Spencer asked how things had gone. I said that they had gone fine. Spencer seemed to sensed my hesitation and asked more directly how I felt about Brandon. I admitted that I had feelings for Brandon, but that I was trying not to. He asked me why I didn't want to have feelings for Brandon. I explained that I was tired of getting hurt and didn't want to get hurt again because I was used to being disappointed.
Spencer seemed to understand why I would feel that way but told me that he felt like I might have some hope in this case. I was a little surprised and confused by this. I begged Spencer to tell me if he knew anything. Spencer started to explain that my name had come up a few times during the semester and that Brandon had always made positive remarks about me. I wasn't convinced that some positive comments were anything more than a reflection of Brandon's character. Spencer tried to convince me that he thought it could be more than that. He said that he was determined to find out and would ask Brandon himself. I assured Spencer that such a gesture was not neccessary, but Spencer was determined to find out.
The next day while on break at work I realized my phone was missing. I was pretty sure I hadn't taken it out to the field so I hoped that it would be at home when I got there. So, as soon as I got back to my house I ran to my room to make sure I hadn't lost my phone. When I found my phone in my room I was happy to see a message from Spencer saying something like "So, I talked to Brandon and I have something you might like to know." He kept trying to keep me in suspense but I told him he better tell me what Brandon said before I went crazy.
It felt like at least ten minutes passed between each text message, though it may have only been seconds. But finally Spencer decided to finally satisfy my curiosity and said "Well, Brandon likes you."
I could not believe it. I felt my world had turned on its axle. "This never happens to me. How is it possible? It must be a miracle! But how will this ever work?" I thought "I live more than four hours away from him? But maybe miracles do happen after all."
My dad mentioned that he liked Brandon a lot (more than any other guy he had met). My mom seemed a little more cautious. She expressed her approval of Brandon but cautioned me to not get my hopes up. I think my mom was just worried about me getting hurt and I couldn't blame her. In the past I had let my heart surpass logic. I had fallen for guys who really didn't care about me, and I had been hurt before. But in the past year I had been trying to learn from previous mistakes because I was determined to never fall for another guy unless he had first said in plain words, that we was falling for me. And so I explained to my mom that I would be careful, and not make any assumtions from the previous day.
That same day when I was on facebook I happened to be talking to my friend (and old FHE brother) Spencer Brown. Spencer just happed to have been Brandon's roommate during the previous semester. He asked me what I had been up to and I mentioned that Brandon had come for a visit. Spencer asked how things had gone. I said that they had gone fine. Spencer seemed to sensed my hesitation and asked more directly how I felt about Brandon. I admitted that I had feelings for Brandon, but that I was trying not to. He asked me why I didn't want to have feelings for Brandon. I explained that I was tired of getting hurt and didn't want to get hurt again because I was used to being disappointed.
Spencer seemed to understand why I would feel that way but told me that he felt like I might have some hope in this case. I was a little surprised and confused by this. I begged Spencer to tell me if he knew anything. Spencer started to explain that my name had come up a few times during the semester and that Brandon had always made positive remarks about me. I wasn't convinced that some positive comments were anything more than a reflection of Brandon's character. Spencer tried to convince me that he thought it could be more than that. He said that he was determined to find out and would ask Brandon himself. I assured Spencer that such a gesture was not neccessary, but Spencer was determined to find out.
The next day while on break at work I realized my phone was missing. I was pretty sure I hadn't taken it out to the field so I hoped that it would be at home when I got there. So, as soon as I got back to my house I ran to my room to make sure I hadn't lost my phone. When I found my phone in my room I was happy to see a message from Spencer saying something like "So, I talked to Brandon and I have something you might like to know." He kept trying to keep me in suspense but I told him he better tell me what Brandon said before I went crazy.
It felt like at least ten minutes passed between each text message, though it may have only been seconds. But finally Spencer decided to finally satisfy my curiosity and said "Well, Brandon likes you."
I could not believe it. I felt my world had turned on its axle. "This never happens to me. How is it possible? It must be a miracle! But how will this ever work?" I thought "I live more than four hours away from him? But maybe miracles do happen after all."
Friday, September 7, 2012
The Trip that Changed Everything!
Saturday morning came quickly with the 7am start time at the cornfield. Normally Saturdays go a lot longer than you expect or they go faster than you expect. It seems the majority of the time they take longer because there is more to do to make up for the fact that the field work isn't being worked in on Sunday. This particular Saturday must have been really lucky though because we were done by 10am. Only 3 hrs! That had to be some kind of record for a Saturday! As soon as Keith and I got home I showered and started getting ready. I had convinced Keith to change my oil (I told him if he would change the oil then he didn't need to pay his part of gas for driving to work) but it had been pushed back due to other events coming up so he had to do it right before I went to Boise. There were a few problems he encountered when changing the oil so it took longer than possible (but I didn't complain because it gave me more time to get ready). But, when I realized I still wasn't going to get to Boise until 1pm even with getting off so late I was a little disappointed, knowing that it would probably only be four hours to spend with Brandon.
As I approached the entrance to the Boise Mall, I nervously got out my phone and called Brandon (as he had asked me to do, so that we could figure out a good place to meet up). As I dialed I felt my heart pounding, waiting for him to answer. When he picked up I asked where he and his family were at. He said I had great timing because they had just decided to stop at the food court for lunch. He then asked me if I had eaten already. I admitted I had not (to be honest, the thought didn't even cross my mind when I was getting ready). But I was hungry now so I was grateful for the offer. Brandon said he would be waiting for me at the escalator to the food court. As I stepped onto the escalator it seemed like all I could hear was my heart beating wildly, anticipating this long awaited moment. And then I saw Brandon. I stared into his amazing blue eyes and smiled. A second later it finally registered that there was a cute little girl standing next to him, holding his hand. He then introduced me to his niece Rylee. I bent down to say hi to her and introduce myself, willing my heart to stop pounding so loud. When I stood up I finally got to hug Brandon, and when he put his arms around me It calmed my racing nerves and I felt so comfortable. So comfortable that it surprised me.
After we hugged he sent Rylee back to his sister and asked what I wanted to eat. Not wanting to be picky, I didn't voice my opinion. So when I told Brandon to choose it suprised me that he picked the exact place I had wanted. When we got to the line I was vocalizing some of the choices on the menu I was considering when he made it clear that he was going to buy my lunch. I hesitated a little and asked if he was sure. He said he wanted to because he had never had the opportunity to do so during winter semester. Another brownie point for Brandon! He then introduce me to his mom and sister and his other niece Jenna. As we ate and talked Brandon mentioned that he and his mom and sisters had decided to leave on Sunday morning instead of that day so that they would have more time to shop. "So," he said "I can go to all the things you said you had going on today if I'm still invited." I said yes. As we finished eating he then said we were leaving and told his mom and sister he would see them later on tonight. His mom seemed surprised by this and asked if he would be with me the whole day. He said he planned on it. "YESs!!!" I thought, "I get to spend a whole day with Brandon Carney!
The rest of the day zoomed by. First we played frisbee golf in the park. As we talked I again realized just how natural and easy it was to be around him. After frisbee golf we went to Goodies (a candy and ice cream shop in Boise) where we shared vanilla bean ice cream. (Which when I mentioned to Savannah and she found out that we ate from the same container, she said shairing dairy products meant that you were comfortable with the idea of kissing each other if you are willing to share jerms like that.)
After we finished at Goodies we met up with my parents and Keith for the BSU scrimage. My dad had bought me an orange BSU shirt just for the occasion so when he realized Brandon was going to be able to come he brought along a blue one of his own for Brandon to wear. As I TRIED to watch the scrimage Brandon and Keith took turns poking me and squishing me between them. Watching them interact I realized that they were already two peas in a pod. Seeing them getting along so well was definitely a plus. I couldn't believe how much they clicked, and within only a seconds of meeting each other. But even though that was quite miraculous to me, what seemed even more amazing was how Brandon and I were together. Just sitting next to him I felt so comfortable that it almost seemed like we were already together and had been that way for a while. I don't really know how to explain it, but it was such a real feeling and I kept wondering if Brandon felt the same way. However, I felt my chances were getting better when Brandon wanted to take some pictures of us together. :)
As I approached the entrance to the Boise Mall, I nervously got out my phone and called Brandon (as he had asked me to do, so that we could figure out a good place to meet up). As I dialed I felt my heart pounding, waiting for him to answer. When he picked up I asked where he and his family were at. He said I had great timing because they had just decided to stop at the food court for lunch. He then asked me if I had eaten already. I admitted I had not (to be honest, the thought didn't even cross my mind when I was getting ready). But I was hungry now so I was grateful for the offer. Brandon said he would be waiting for me at the escalator to the food court. As I stepped onto the escalator it seemed like all I could hear was my heart beating wildly, anticipating this long awaited moment. And then I saw Brandon. I stared into his amazing blue eyes and smiled. A second later it finally registered that there was a cute little girl standing next to him, holding his hand. He then introduced me to his niece Rylee. I bent down to say hi to her and introduce myself, willing my heart to stop pounding so loud. When I stood up I finally got to hug Brandon, and when he put his arms around me It calmed my racing nerves and I felt so comfortable. So comfortable that it surprised me.
After we hugged he sent Rylee back to his sister and asked what I wanted to eat. Not wanting to be picky, I didn't voice my opinion. So when I told Brandon to choose it suprised me that he picked the exact place I had wanted. When we got to the line I was vocalizing some of the choices on the menu I was considering when he made it clear that he was going to buy my lunch. I hesitated a little and asked if he was sure. He said he wanted to because he had never had the opportunity to do so during winter semester. Another brownie point for Brandon! He then introduce me to his mom and sister and his other niece Jenna. As we ate and talked Brandon mentioned that he and his mom and sisters had decided to leave on Sunday morning instead of that day so that they would have more time to shop. "So," he said "I can go to all the things you said you had going on today if I'm still invited." I said yes. As we finished eating he then said we were leaving and told his mom and sister he would see them later on tonight. His mom seemed surprised by this and asked if he would be with me the whole day. He said he planned on it. "YESs!!!" I thought, "I get to spend a whole day with Brandon Carney!
The rest of the day zoomed by. First we played frisbee golf in the park. As we talked I again realized just how natural and easy it was to be around him. After frisbee golf we went to Goodies (a candy and ice cream shop in Boise) where we shared vanilla bean ice cream. (Which when I mentioned to Savannah and she found out that we ate from the same container, she said shairing dairy products meant that you were comfortable with the idea of kissing each other if you are willing to share jerms like that.)
After we finished at Goodies we met up with my parents and Keith for the BSU scrimage. My dad had bought me an orange BSU shirt just for the occasion so when he realized Brandon was going to be able to come he brought along a blue one of his own for Brandon to wear. As I TRIED to watch the scrimage Brandon and Keith took turns poking me and squishing me between them. Watching them interact I realized that they were already two peas in a pod. Seeing them getting along so well was definitely a plus. I couldn't believe how much they clicked, and within only a seconds of meeting each other. But even though that was quite miraculous to me, what seemed even more amazing was how Brandon and I were together. Just sitting next to him I felt so comfortable that it almost seemed like we were already together and had been that way for a while. I don't really know how to explain it, but it was such a real feeling and I kept wondering if Brandon felt the same way. However, I felt my chances were getting better when Brandon wanted to take some pictures of us together. :)
During the BSU scrimage Keith, and I realized that we needed to stop at home and get a few things before Savannah's Fall Barn Party. Once we changed and grabbed some snacks for the party Brandon, Keith and I jumped in the car, headed to Savannah's house. When we got to the party I introduced Brandon to Savannah and a couple of my cousins who were there as well. It surprised me how well Brandon blended right in and joined in on the fun. He started dancing along to the music and making converstation with others in the group. At some point in time someone mentioned to me that it seemed like we were already dating. I couldn't help but agree with them but I could only hope right then that maybe Brandon would have agreed as well.
At some point in the evening Brandon and I decided that we needed a brake from dancing. He asked about the fire Savannah had mentioned earlier. I asked Savannah about the fire and she directed us to the oposite yard, on the other side of the house. Brandon and I both sat down on the stumps which were situated around the fire as chairs would be. As we talked Brandon asked about the likelihood of me moving back to Rexburg. I mentioned a few ideas I had thought of, such as taking some continuing education classes at BYU-I. He told me he thought I should come back and then mentioned that it would have been nice to have both been in school at the same time so we could have gotten to know each other better. Then Brandon started talking about my family and how easy it was to get along with Keith. When he started talking about how comfortable it was to be around my family I sensed that he was trying to bring up a more personal conversation about us. I was so grateful that he was about to start the conversation I had wanted to come up when we were interepted by three teenagers. As they approached they asked if they were interrupting something and asked if they could join us. We said they could join us, but we both felt that they had definitely had interrupted a needed conversation. Once they sat down it didn't us very long to realize they weren't about to leave any time soon, so we went back to dancing. We continued dancing until about midnight, and then Brandon, Keith and I all decided it was probably time for us to call it a night.
As we walked to the car Brandon asked if he could drive. This surprised me but I said yes (I was completely comfortable with it, but I sensed that he had a specific reason in mind for wanting to). A part of me wondered once we drove away, if he had hoped I would continue my habit (that I had mentioned to him earlier) of always resting my hand on the gear shift as I drove. I noticed that he had also placed his hand there but I didn't know what to do. It seemed too forward to just put my hand right on top, especially if that was not what he was intending at all. I wanted so badly to just ask him... and I think we both wanted to talk about what we were feeling... but, with Keith in the car it just wasn't the right place and time. So, Brandon and I just asked each other questions about interests and shared stories from our growing up years until we arrived at the hotel where he and his family were staying. Brandon hugged me and said bye to Keith, and then hugged me again and said to keep in touch.
As I drove away I felt like I was already missing a really close friend. In one day my connection to Brandon had transformed from a budding friendship/crush to a dear friend and someone I knew I cared about. When I got home and realized that I really didn't know when I would see Brandon again or how it could ever work out, all I could do was hope that the feelings between us wouldn't fade away with the miles that seperated us.
Thursday, May 17, 2012
The Promise Kept
After I went back home I had hoped to occasionally hear from Brandon since he had talked of visiting me (possibly even before his cousin's wedding) but 2 months had passed and I hadn't heard anything from him. I was starting to wonder how I could have allowed myself to believe that Brandon might actually like me. But then one evening as I was watching a movie with my parents I saw my cell phone screen Light up with "Brandon Ca..." My first reaction was confusion. The first person that came to mind was a fellow coworker also named Brandon (who was 18 and had a talent for making everyone go crazy). But then I thought "Why and how could he be calling me? No, it isn't possible because I wouldn't have his number and he wouldn't have mine." And yes, I know it seems quite silly that it could have taken me that much time to come to the conclusion that it was Brandon Carney... but after two months of never hearing from Brandon I had assumed the worst: he was like most guys who acted sincerely interested only to realize either a couple days or a couple weeks later that they really weren't so interested anymore.
When I finally realized it was Brandon Carney calling me I jumped off the couch and ran for the nearest bedroom to answer the phone. I was so excited that he was actually calling me! But suddenly my analytical brain started zooming and I decided I didn't want to sound as if this was the day I had been waiting for (even if it was). I thought I had better not scare him off, so no matter why he called I had to act nonchalant. Well, it was hard to do when he asked what I was doing on the weekend of August 19th and 20th. When I looked at the calendar and realized those dates were 3 weeks away I wanted to believe it was a sign that he was still interested in me (why else would someone call that far ahead, right?). As happy as I was to hear from him I was convincing with my casual and unconcerned tone, that I wasn't too concerned about working things out. I even kept the conversation short and business like... never suspecting that he might actually think I really wasn't interested. (Yes, I know, we girls--especially me--are silly!)
As much as I had tried to mask my feelings from Brandon during our phone conversation, I couldn't mask my feelings with my coworkers. During the following weeks I questioned my co-workers as to whether there was a possibility that he had any interest in me or if he was simply a friend. I looked forward to his visit but tried to tell myself I shouldn't get too excited because the likelihood that he liked me when I liked him was next to impossible in my mind--as it had rarely happened in the past, and never lasted more than a few weeks.
A week before Brandon was going to come down to Boise, Brandon texted me to ask what my schedule was looking like and if I had remembered he was coming. Oh Brandon, its a good thing you didn't know how aware I was that it was a week away. I was so nervous and excited... but trying not to be... it was ridiculous. But once again, I tried to act calm and nonchalant about everything. But as we continued to communicate I soon realized I was probably coming across as indifferent. So at the end of the conversation I told him that though I was busy, I would make time to see him. My statement seemed to have improved the quality of conversation and a glimmer of hope appeared once again in my mind.
When Brandon called me on Friday to figure out which day would be best to try to get together I noticed how comfortable it was to talk to him. We decided that we would both have more time to see each other the next day (Saturday). When I asked when he was going out of town he said his family was planning on leaving at 5 or 6pm Saturday. I was a little saddened by that news because I figured I would get off at work at noon at the earliest, then by the time I got ready and drove to Boise to meet him it'd be closer to 1:30 or 2. I was a little disappointed that I wasn't going to have more time with him. But then again, I had spent most of work talking to my good friend Savannah about how seeing him would probably just be another disappointment because I was interested in him... and whenever I liked a boy that meant another heartbreak. "And," I said "I will be spending money for the gas to get there, probably have to buy my own lunch, and waste a lot of time, money and energy on a boy who doesn't think of me as anything more than a friend."
That night I couldn't decide how to feel as I drifted off to sleep. All I knew is that I was either waiting to be disappointed or possibly pleasantly surprised. With all of my previous experience I had my bets set on the first.
A week before Brandon was going to come down to Boise, Brandon texted me to ask what my schedule was looking like and if I had remembered he was coming. Oh Brandon, its a good thing you didn't know how aware I was that it was a week away. I was so nervous and excited... but trying not to be... it was ridiculous. But once again, I tried to act calm and nonchalant about everything. But as we continued to communicate I soon realized I was probably coming across as indifferent. So at the end of the conversation I told him that though I was busy, I would make time to see him. My statement seemed to have improved the quality of conversation and a glimmer of hope appeared once again in my mind.
When Brandon called me on Friday to figure out which day would be best to try to get together I noticed how comfortable it was to talk to him. We decided that we would both have more time to see each other the next day (Saturday). When I asked when he was going out of town he said his family was planning on leaving at 5 or 6pm Saturday. I was a little saddened by that news because I figured I would get off at work at noon at the earliest, then by the time I got ready and drove to Boise to meet him it'd be closer to 1:30 or 2. I was a little disappointed that I wasn't going to have more time with him. But then again, I had spent most of work talking to my good friend Savannah about how seeing him would probably just be another disappointment because I was interested in him... and whenever I liked a boy that meant another heartbreak. "And," I said "I will be spending money for the gas to get there, probably have to buy my own lunch, and waste a lot of time, money and energy on a boy who doesn't think of me as anything more than a friend."
That night I couldn't decide how to feel as I drifted off to sleep. All I knew is that I was either waiting to be disappointed or possibly pleasantly surprised. With all of my previous experience I had my bets set on the first.
Sunday, November 27, 2011
Visiting Rexburg
As a new BYU-Idaho graduate with apparently no marriage prospects I knew that technically I could go wherever I wanted to go and do whatever I wanted to do. But, at the same time I knew I had to face the reality of finding a job and starting some kind of career. Moving back home to work in the cornfield wasn't easy. I was getting a little burned out after 9 previous summers and I was even more worried that I didn't really have a plan that I could count on. I was constantly worrying, planning and analyzing my options for the future.
Most of this worrying, planning and analyzing was centered around my plans to move to Provo. I liked the idea of Provo because it meant I could have a fresh start... you know, make new friends, meet new guys, etc. But, on occasion, I would think back to the end of my last semester, wondering if Brandon and I really had hit it off during that April snowball fight, or if it was only my wishful thinking. The good news was that my mom, Angie, Marcie, and I were all planning a mother-daughter weekend in Idaho Falls. The fact that I was planning to use some of that time in Rexburg to see friends was mentioned to one of my FHE brothers from the previous semester who just happened to be Brandon's roommate (Spencer Brown). Apparently Spencer had mentioned to Brandon that I was planning on coming to town because I found the following post on my facebook wall from Brandon: "Jennifer, What is this I hear about you coming to the great Rexburg. I sure hope that you make some time for me to see you. Let me know what is going on in your life. Thanks for being you. Bye bye for now."
Of course this created some excitement. I hoped that it was a confirmation of the hope I had held for the last several weeks. So, of course I replied to let him know I was going to be there and would enjoy seeing him if he were not too busy. Brandon said he would make time to see me and mentioned that Spencer was having a birthday party (that I'd actually already been invited to). To my delight I ended up spending most of the time at that party talking to Brandon. During our conversation Brandon mentioned that his cousin was getting married in August and would be having a reception in Boise. He suggested that he would enjoy visiting me on that occasion if I had time. I agreed that it would good to see him if he had the opportunity.
When I left Rexburg the following day I pondered the conversation that had taken place on Saturday night. The question in my mind was not of his good intentions, but rather if he would actually follow through. I wanted to hold on to the hope that he had given me in mentioning his cousin's wedding but previous experience had taught me not to count on it. And so I wondered as we drove away, was my first impression right... Was Brandon really different than anyone I had ever known?
Most of this worrying, planning and analyzing was centered around my plans to move to Provo. I liked the idea of Provo because it meant I could have a fresh start... you know, make new friends, meet new guys, etc. But, on occasion, I would think back to the end of my last semester, wondering if Brandon and I really had hit it off during that April snowball fight, or if it was only my wishful thinking. The good news was that my mom, Angie, Marcie, and I were all planning a mother-daughter weekend in Idaho Falls. The fact that I was planning to use some of that time in Rexburg to see friends was mentioned to one of my FHE brothers from the previous semester who just happened to be Brandon's roommate (Spencer Brown). Apparently Spencer had mentioned to Brandon that I was planning on coming to town because I found the following post on my facebook wall from Brandon: "Jennifer, What is this I hear about you coming to the great Rexburg. I sure hope that you make some time for me to see you. Let me know what is going on in your life. Thanks for being you. Bye bye for now."
Of course this created some excitement. I hoped that it was a confirmation of the hope I had held for the last several weeks. So, of course I replied to let him know I was going to be there and would enjoy seeing him if he were not too busy. Brandon said he would make time to see me and mentioned that Spencer was having a birthday party (that I'd actually already been invited to). To my delight I ended up spending most of the time at that party talking to Brandon. During our conversation Brandon mentioned that his cousin was getting married in August and would be having a reception in Boise. He suggested that he would enjoy visiting me on that occasion if I had time. I agreed that it would good to see him if he had the opportunity.
When I left Rexburg the following day I pondered the conversation that had taken place on Saturday night. The question in my mind was not of his good intentions, but rather if he would actually follow through. I wanted to hold on to the hope that he had given me in mentioning his cousin's wedding but previous experience had taught me not to count on it. And so I wondered as we drove away, was my first impression right... Was Brandon really different than anyone I had ever known?
Friday, November 4, 2011
"Expect the Unexpected"
In response to some some car problems with my Grandparent's old pickup truck Keith had given me the advice "Expect the unexpected." That was definitely true for that old '82 pickup but I also feel it is applicable to everyday life. So, on that note, I begin the story of my post graduation life.
But first, I must note that the inspiration for this blog happens to be the main subject of my story. Brandon Carney. He is a key player in my post graduation life. But before I get ahead of myself I must first go back to April of 2011, where it all began.
It was finals week, I was about to graduate, and I was facing the unknown. The unknown scared me but I had a plan. I was going to graduate from BYU-Idaho, move back to Nampa, Idaho (where I grew up) to work in the cornfield for one last summer, then move to Utah, get a job, and save up for a year or two so that I could start on a Masters Degree, and then I was going to find the man of my dreams. Today I look back at the life I had planned out for myself and smile, realizing that once again, I am glad I didn't get everything I thought I really wanted.
But lets go back to finals week where the story unfolds. I was ready to be done with school, but sad to leave my friends. But still I felt that I was getting too old for the Rexburg scene (at a school nicknamed "BYU-I Do" being a single girl at 23... going on 24 isn't always easy) and I was sure there was nothing left for me in good old Rexburg. I never expected that one day (well, more like a few hours in that day) would be the start of this incredible journey.
It was simple really, how it all happened. Brandon was being a helpful friend (though he really didn't know me all that well) and bringing me a few things from my sister's house that I needed for graduation (and to those who don't know him he would do that for any friend because he is just that kind of a guy). When Brandon got to the apartment Justin and Shay (a couple of our mutual friends) were already at our apartment to say their goodbyes at the end of the semester.
To all who don't know Brandon, Justin or Shay, I think I could safely say that each of them fit the theme of this post. Before I knew it one of them had grabbed my roommate Angie, slung her over their shoulder and rushed outside. (Unsurprisingly snow had fallen on the ground that day... though it was more like slush by the evening). Moments after laughing at the squeals I heard coming through the doorway I found myself in the same perdicament... but I wasn't about to let them have an easy fight. So, Brandon, Justin, Shay, Angie and I all ended up in a snowball fight.
Finally my hands felt too frozen to keep going so I rushed inside, only to be followed by the rest of the group into the apartment. The snowball fight ended but the fun didn't. It turned into a tickle fight until we were all too tired to continue. I sat down and to my surprise Brandon sat down next to me. We all enjoyed talking and laughing about all the fun we had had. The time had rushed by (as it always does when you are having a lot of fun) and soon it was time for the guys to leave for curfew. I remembered feeling a tinge of sadness as I hugged each one of them. I was going to miss Rexburg and all the friends I had made, and I had no idea when I would be coming back... after all, I was never going to live in Rexburg again... or so I thought.
But first, I must note that the inspiration for this blog happens to be the main subject of my story. Brandon Carney. He is a key player in my post graduation life. But before I get ahead of myself I must first go back to April of 2011, where it all began.
It was finals week, I was about to graduate, and I was facing the unknown. The unknown scared me but I had a plan. I was going to graduate from BYU-Idaho, move back to Nampa, Idaho (where I grew up) to work in the cornfield for one last summer, then move to Utah, get a job, and save up for a year or two so that I could start on a Masters Degree, and then I was going to find the man of my dreams. Today I look back at the life I had planned out for myself and smile, realizing that once again, I am glad I didn't get everything I thought I really wanted.
But lets go back to finals week where the story unfolds. I was ready to be done with school, but sad to leave my friends. But still I felt that I was getting too old for the Rexburg scene (at a school nicknamed "BYU-I Do" being a single girl at 23... going on 24 isn't always easy) and I was sure there was nothing left for me in good old Rexburg. I never expected that one day (well, more like a few hours in that day) would be the start of this incredible journey.
It was simple really, how it all happened. Brandon was being a helpful friend (though he really didn't know me all that well) and bringing me a few things from my sister's house that I needed for graduation (and to those who don't know him he would do that for any friend because he is just that kind of a guy). When Brandon got to the apartment Justin and Shay (a couple of our mutual friends) were already at our apartment to say their goodbyes at the end of the semester.
To all who don't know Brandon, Justin or Shay, I think I could safely say that each of them fit the theme of this post. Before I knew it one of them had grabbed my roommate Angie, slung her over their shoulder and rushed outside. (Unsurprisingly snow had fallen on the ground that day... though it was more like slush by the evening). Moments after laughing at the squeals I heard coming through the doorway I found myself in the same perdicament... but I wasn't about to let them have an easy fight. So, Brandon, Justin, Shay, Angie and I all ended up in a snowball fight.
Finally my hands felt too frozen to keep going so I rushed inside, only to be followed by the rest of the group into the apartment. The snowball fight ended but the fun didn't. It turned into a tickle fight until we were all too tired to continue. I sat down and to my surprise Brandon sat down next to me. We all enjoyed talking and laughing about all the fun we had had. The time had rushed by (as it always does when you are having a lot of fun) and soon it was time for the guys to leave for curfew. I remembered feeling a tinge of sadness as I hugged each one of them. I was going to miss Rexburg and all the friends I had made, and I had no idea when I would be coming back... after all, I was never going to live in Rexburg again... or so I thought.
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